


The fire in my bones

by chaoticdean



Series: Suptober 2020 [20]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Established Castiel/Dean Winchester, Home, M/M, Misunderstandings, Suptober 2020 (Supernatural), idk what to tag this, soft idiots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-20
Updated: 2020-10-20
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:42:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27126034
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chaoticdean/pseuds/chaoticdean
Summary: Suptober 2020, day 20: home.It’s not a secret that Dean Winchester isn’t particularly good with words, but when he fucks up and unintentionally hurts Cas, he knows he has to do better.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Series: Suptober 2020 [20]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1949341
Comments: 6
Kudos: 84





	The fire in my bones

**Author's Note:**

> This has 100% been inspired by the song "Next to You" by Little Big Town.

It would be lying to say that everything is all flowers and butterflies once Dean and Castiel finally finds the strength to pull their heads out of their ass and get together. Both of them knew that, and both of them agreed that it was going to be a long and thorny journey toward something solid.

Still, some days are just harder than others, and today proves to be a solid pain in Dean’s ass.

They’ve been arguing about stupid things all day long. It started with Cas finishing the pot of coffee without thinking of preparing a new one and Dean making a scene about it, continued on when Cas seemingly closed the door of the Impala a little bit too loudly for Dean’s taste when they came back from grocery shopping, and then it was all about Cas helping Dean with dinner the wrong way, Cas not reading the right book to help with the lore, Cas looking at him what Dean considered _funny_ , and now it’s just… He’s tired. He knows he’s been a big back of dick to Cas the whole day, and it’s making him even more miserable because he knows damn well he doesn’t deserve at least half the shit he’s been given the whole time.

_It’s like you keep fucking shit up on purpose, Winchester._

“I don’t wanna talk right now, I just… I need space.”

It rings through their bedroom, and from where Dean is sitting on the bed he can see it land on Castiel’s face, can see the way it makes his face fall, how his shoulder slumps as he stands against the door frame of the room they’ve been sharing for a few months.

And Dean curses himself, because _shit_ , no, that’s not —

“Okay, I’ll just,” Cas stammers, visibly pained, and Dean’s stupid brain is unable to fully let him move, “I’ll get out of your hair.”

“No, Cas, that’s not —“

But the ex-angel is out of the room when Dean’s brain finally catches up and let his limbs go back to being functional, and it sure as hell feels like he’s just made a terrible mistake.

“Cas, wait!” he practically yells, storming out of the room and to the corridor.

Castiel is already all the way down to the room that’s still technically _his_ , although he hasn’t been sleeping there ever since they first kissed, what already feels like a lifetime ago.

Dean feels physically sick at the thought of not getting to bed with Cas, not falling asleep pressed flush against him. No matter the arguments, they haven’t fallen asleep apart since they’ve been together, and Dean is not about to let his stupid mouth ruin it for himself. At this point, honestly, he’d rather let a vampire bite him than having to go to bed without Castiel laying beside him.

_You’re such a sap, Winchester._

Castiel stops on his tracks and turns around as Dean walk the remaining distance between them.

“It’s not, I just —“ he stammers as his eyes finally finds Cas’, and his heart sinks again when he witnesses the hurt dancing inside his cobalt blues, “I didn’t mean to say it like that.”

“What did you mean, then?” Cas answers, his voice low, almost harsh, visibly hurt.

Dean reaches out then, taking one of Castiel’s hand in his. Cas doesn’t move but lets the hunter intertwine their fingers slowly.

“I meant I need some time to cool off, I…”

“I’ll leave you to it, then,” Cas says, his eyes dropping to the floor, already trying to retreat.

“Cas, I’m sorry.”

It seems to take him by surprise, and he raises his eyes again, catching Dean’s gaze.

“I’ve been an asshole all day, and I’m sorry. I’m tired. I don’t want you to go.”

Cas gaze softens and he moves closer, squeezing Dean’s hand as he raised the other to cup Dean’s cheek.

“Stay with me, please,” Dean whispers as Cas wraps him up in a hug, and the huge sigh he let out takes him by surprise, not even aware that he was still holding it.

“Okay. Let’s get to bed, alright?” Cas breathes against the shell of his ear, and it takes everything in Dean not turn his head to kiss him.

“Okay.”

It takes a while for both of them to find their way to each other under the covers, but eventually Castiel wraps himself around Dean, and the hunter’s head finds its place in the crook of Cas’ neck, breathing his scent deeply like it’s some kind of elixir. Castiel’s hand cards gently through the dirty blond locks, sending little tingles through Dean’s spines.

“I don’t deserve you,” Dean finally whispers, face still hidden against Cas’ skin, “I’m sorry for today.”

“It’s okay,” Cas answers calmly, letting his other hand wanders on the skin of Dean’s back.

“How is it okay?” Dean asks, speechless, “I treated you like garbage all day, and yet you’re here treating me like a goddamn princess, and I just… I _know_ I don’t deserve it.”

“You deserve it because I love you.”

No matter how many time he hears it, those three little words coming out of Castiel’s mouth will never stop making his heart skyrockets into oblivion levels.

“As if it excuses anything,” he mumbles against the skin of Castiel’s throat, letting his lips brush against him.

“Oh, it doesn’t. I’m making you sleep on the couch if you keep being this infuriating tomorrow.”

Dean huffs a laugh, pressing himself deeper into Castiel’s embrace, afraid it’s all a dream and he’s going to disappear at some point. This can’t be real, right? Dean Winchester doesn’t deserve to be _this_ loved.

“Don’t make me sleep on the couch, please,” he whispers, closing his eyes, “I sleep a little deeper when you’re next to me.”

It’s in the way he says it, or maybe in the way he lets his lips map out the line of Castiel’s jaw. Dean isn’t good with words, has said “I love you” a grand total of 3 times so far, but he knows how to mean it. He knows Castiel gets it, gets what the “I’ve bought your favorite tea” and “I’ve made you PB&J” really mean.

Gets that when Dean says “I sleep a little better when you’re next to me”, what he really means is “you’re the fire in my bones, you’re my heart and my home”.

“I know I don’t say it enough, angel,” Dean brushes a kiss over his cheekbone softly, “but I breathe a little deeper when I’m here with you.”

_And I’ll be fine in the morning, next to you._

**Author's Note:**

> _  
>  **rebloggable on[Tumblr](https://chaoticdean.tumblr.com/post/632537013770452992/the-fire-in-my-bones)**   
>  _


End file.
